welcome to the meat&fish counter, yes that little space at the back of the supermarket furthest away from a door or exit point (you’re all mine) I’m the guy waiting,waiting,waiting for you, specifically you to walk past, or at least try to I’ll give you a cheeky “hello” or “morning” suck you in and sell my wares like a whore to a client .
cynicism aside it’s a good job I meet a lot of people ( more of that later)get to handle raw meat and fish all day and generally act like a rouge market trader most if not all of the time. Del boy crossed with captain Jack Sparrow.
it’s a fair bet at some point either you or your other half has walked over to the counter “just for a look” only to be met with “how can I help you”?
“just looking” you reply here’s a case in point MOST OF YOU ONLY KNOW 1 OR 2 SPECIES OF FISH I’VE GOT ON THAT COUNTER,and that’s by guessing “ooo I’ll have a salmon fillet please, a big one”
at the other end of the counter I pick up a piece of salmon “this one” I enquire?
“no this one” screams the old hag with the moustache Tom Selleck would be proud of “that’s trout fillet” I sigh. I deal with this stunning level of intellect 7 hours a day 5 days a week, other classics include a handful, enough for 2..(can vary between 3ounces per person and something mobydick sized) inevitably at this point I’VE GOT YOU ON THE HOOK there’s no way your going away with enough oh no your going away and going to have to invite the street to dinner. By the way if you ever wonder why your food bill is astrofuckingnomical (a word I hear sometimes) don’t ever ask for a handful. I’ve got big hands.

My dog often asks “how were things dad? Bring any samples home”? “Turkish as we’ll call him knows what “mein kampf” means clever dogs Labradors, very clever.
Turkish and me generally have a very good standard of living he is a butchers dog after all, he does rather like a sample or two. more of him later….